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  • I love my squirrel mask!

    posted by JimfromEircom on 07/01/2014
    0

    Involvement:Expert (understands the inner workings) - Ownership:1 day to 1 week

    Pros:

    No-one cared about who I was until I put on the mask.

    I wore my mask, upon receiving it, at a business function. Key dignitaries were there and I managed to save the life of Barack Obama from a North Korean Assassin Squad using a bottle of coke, 3 meters of string and a squirrel mask. I am receiving a Medal of Honor.

    Adds hilarity to bank robberies.

    Helps to relax adults in court-ordered anger-management therapy, as well as in therapy sessions with the clinically depressed.

    I now live in a tree.

    The squirrels accept me finally.

    Higher quality than the picture makes it look!

    Great for those looking to get into the furry scene.

    Cons:

    I can't see anything unless my head is at the right angle

    I now have to adopt my secret identity daily

    Random gentleman ask me to "suck their nuts"

    OtherThoughts:

    The ear hair is a little creepy for my liking.

    My sex life has dramatically improved upon receipt of the mask.

    Bottomline:

    Buy this now. No regrets.

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